Day 18

I was a raving bitch tonight.  I came home from work around 7:30 pm grumpy and starving, to my poor husband who had waited to make me a fresh hummus pizza but instead I just growled at him and ate leftover soup.  All that was on my mind was REAL pizza covered with sausage and pepperoni.  It was the most bizarre thing.

We were watching "Modern Family" and part of the episode was about Cameron and Mitchell going on a juice fast.  Mitchell was describing the six stages and the slow descent into madness that he has observed Cameron go through as he is starving himself.  Can't lie, a few of those stages completely resonated with me.  Especially the "Despair" and "Anger" stages.  Especially right now.

Okay, I am being overly dramatic, I know.  But I seriously considered sticking my entire face into an enormous bowl of vanilla pudding with Oreos during lunch today and was ready to give this diet the big "F-you".  That was the anger-rebellion stage.  Then, coming home all I could do was groan about how I am depriving myself of all the joys of eating.  That was the despair stage.  Finally, completely bored with my drama, Jason asked me why I started this diet the first place and I seriously wanted to rip off his head.  That was the anger.  Again.

Thankfully, I went to bed and woke up realizing just how crazy I was last night.  Is this the "Acceptance" stage?

Day 18 Menu:

• Breakfast - Chocolate peanut butter protein shake and whole wheat pita with peanut butter
• Lunch - Tuscan vegetable soup, peanut butter and jelly sandwich, vegan apple-chesnut stuffing
• Snack - Wasabi peas
• Dinner - Tuscan vegetable soup, pita chips, roasted garlic hummus